Confession time: I've been feeling frustrated lately after returning from the World Domination Summit (super fun-crazy-inspiring-overwhelming shin dig for non-conformist types)... As if there's a time limit for how long I have to process, decompress and then "bottle & sell" what I learned there. (Says the vagabond leftist.) Oy fucking vey.
As if somewhere in the middle of South Dakota, while biking a 70 mile day, stopping every 30 minutes to stretch my dying hips and hydrate my scorched body, my little "business" (who's products I have not yet clearly identified, let alone, "produced") is supposed to take off and earn me a "healthy living" (funny phrase, in my context, don't ya think?). And how? By working my ass off, of course. By beating productivity to the ground & forcing wisdom out of a stubborn glass ketchup bottle that I can't even find because... right...we're in South Dakota!
In reality, having zero time to do anything but ride my bicycle across the country (ie--have the adventure of a lifetime) is a blessing. But not just for the incredible places & people we meet--for the invaluable lessons we're learning (like them, or not).
For instance, TAKE IT SLOW. I can't rush... even if I want to, even though I'm frustrated, even though I'm scared (of losing the mojo, of feeling left out, of not being seen, of not being enough, of missing my chance.)
Instead, I'm forced to trust that things are sinking in nice & slow, little by little, at just the right pace. I'm forced to trust that I am in the perfect place and my "work" has all the time in the world to come together. I'm forced to remember why I'm really here and what my real Life Work is. And i gotta break it to ya... It's not life coaching or literacy teaching or cycling (god, no!) or writing or making art or .... or any "occupation" you could name. My Life Work has no title. My Life Work is a practice.
That practice is love. That's it.
My Life Work is to practice love.
That's what all my "work-work" always, always boils down to. And there is nothing in the way of practicing love. Never, ever, ever. No matter where i am or what i'm doing. Nothing real. Nothing true.
I recently met an awesome man named Steve who biked the world with his wife in the early 80's. He said to me, in reference to his grand adventure,
"The only problems we had were the ones we created with our own imagination."
Steve was spot on. He understood where so many of us go to torture ourselves. He understood my agony. He pointed me to my freedom.
Which is: There is nothing to fret; nothing at all. Even our worst nightmares coming true are openings to love. I sorta hate to say it because it's really fucking hard to practice acceptance THAT huge (and much easier to slide into thinking that "loving all reality" is some hippy dippy, non-realistic BULL), but I just know it's the practice for me. The practice of a lifetime. The biggest adventure I could ever go on and nothing can ever keep me from it except myself.
So here's to recognizing my neurosis... and then loving them... and then letting them go.
Here's to practicing the Life Work that will follow me wherever I go.
Here's to practicing love.
How about you? What's your empire built on? What's your Life Work practice?